The joy of parenthood
by Bouncy cat
Summary: Iruka comes across something strange on his way back from a mission. He decides to take it to the Hokage. Will be kakairu eventually.
1. Chapter 1

Taking that baby from the forrest was the worst decision Iruka had ever made. He couldn't believe the hokage was trying to foist the child off on him. "Tsunade-sama, you have no idea why this child was dumped," he tried. "It may be a danger to the village!"

"Then why did you bring it here, Iruka-sensei?" She sounded amused but her voice had a sharp undertone.

Iruka shook his head in frustration. "It's not my decision to make!"

"Ah, but you made it anyway. You brought it to me and that means this village is now responsible for the well-being of this child, and I am giving," she lifted the blanket for a second, "him to you to care for Iruka-sensei."

"But I don't know a thing about caring for babies!"

"Neither does any other first time father or mother. This is something you learn by doing, and I am asking, no, _ordering_ you to do this."

Iruka looked down at the ground for a moment, biting his lip, and then he looked up determinedly. "I have the right to refuse a mission if I don't think I can complete it successfully."

Tsunade's eyes became a little colder. "You do. And I have the right to ignore your refusal, especially if I think that you are being motivated by your own comfort instead of the good of this village."

Iruka grit his teeth. How dare she accuse him of-

"You are the logical choice for this task Iruka-sensei. You're good with children. You know where this one came from, which is classified information from now on by the way, and your job is one of the most stable ones in this village. I'm giving you permission to take the child to class with you and I'm pulling you off mission desk duties. No missions either for the foreseeable future. If anyone asks, the child is yours."

Iruka sputtered. "Mine? But-"

"Like I said, Iruka-sensei, I don't want anyone, aside from those who already know, to know where this child came from and under what circumstances it was found. The child is yours, make something up. You can say it's the result of a one night stand with a pretty civilian who can't raise the child herself."

Iruka looked at the ugly baby in Tsunade's arms. _A '__pretty_' civilian_?_

He was once again struck by the sheer ugliness of the baby. The boy's eyes seemed too close together and his hair was patchy. His eyelids looked swollen and the rash on his face didn't do much to improve the look either. Also, babies weren't supposed to be skinny. They were supposed to be fat and round. The boy's arms and legs seemed too long for the little body, and you weren't supposed to be able to see its little ribs like that.

Iruka felt a pang of guilt for his uncharitable thoughts. The state the poor child was in should cause pity, not revulsion. And Iruka did pity him. But the urge to take care of it, to hug it and comfort it…it just wasn't there. The boy was like a little bird straight from the egg, bony and fragile, and…ugly. It didn't invite touch. If ever there was a child whose face only a mother could love…this was it. And Iruka was no mother.

"You're dismissed Iruka-sensei." Tsunade said to him.

With a barely concealed huff Iruka turned to go. He was halfway through the room before Tsunade's voice halted him.

"The child…Iruka-sensei."

Gritting his teeth he turned back and took the baby from her arms. He was sorely tempted to be rough with it, to make Tsunade rethink putting this burden on him. But the kid was helpless, and unhealthy, and abandoned, and however much Iruka felt like it, he couldn't kick someone when they were already down.

He gently slid his arms under the fragile bundle and lifted it – _him_ – out of Tsunade's arms and marched out of the office.

He was out of the building before Tsunade's other comments hit home. No more missions, and even worse…no more mission desk duty. How the hell did she expect him to pay not only for his own living expenses but for a child too, on his teacher's salary alone? He could barely get around on that when he was on his own. The boy would need diapers, and baby food, and …stuff.

He supposed he could clear out one of his boxes with books. With a large pillow for a mattress and some towels for bedding it would make a suitable bed. And how old were babies when they were ready for normal food anyway?

Iruka sighed. He hadn't lied to Tsunade. He really didn't know the first thing about children this age. He only got them when their little brains were already partly functioning. The kids he worked with could be reasoned with. They responded to rewards and punishment. They could talk to him and explain what they wanted or needed and why they were upset or why they were happy. They were housebroken. They were nothing at all like this little bundle of stinking ugliness.

* * *

Earlier that day

His mission had been a simple one. Easy money. Drop off the scroll and return. The first part of his mission had gone off without a hitch. He'd delivered the scroll to the person who fit the description and knew the codeword at the exact time and place that had been agreed upon. The sand ninja would take care of it for the rest of the journey.

His return trip was where everything had gone to hell.

It was the crying that stopped him. At first he thought some animal was trapped somewhere. Careful to avoid possible traps he'd searched through the surrounding forest until he came upon the source of the angry wailing. It was a baby. An unhealthy and skinny looking thing. For some reason the child had been placed within a large circle of stones, strange designs drawn into the earth around it. The baby was naked, and definitely not pleased with its situation. Iruka couldn't blame him. It was autumn and nearing the evening. The ground was cold and wet.

Ignoring the child for the moment, Iruka scouted the forest surrounding the clearing thoroughly. He couldn't detect a human presence there at all. The child had been, for all intents and purposes, abandoned.

He debated with himself for a while. Should he take the child? It would undoubtedly die here if left alone for much longer. If the cold of the approaching night didn't do the kid in, some animal would probably be attracted to it.

Finally he made up his mind. Tensely he stepped into the circle, expecting something to happen. But nothing did. He was closer to the child now. Close enough to see an angry rash on the kid's body.

This was the unhealthiest baby he'd ever seen. Feeling slightly revolted Iruka reached out to lift the child up.

The second he touched it, the child stopped crying. Iruka was so startled by the sudden lack of noise that he jumped back. Chastising himself for his jumpiness he reached out again. The child opened its eyes and Iruka halted. He half expected the eyes to be completely black or completely white. Something unsettling, something to explain why this kid was here, abandoned. There had to be some reason. But aside from its ugliness Iruka couldn't see anything wrong with it.

Carefully Iruka picked the boy up. The baby was so fragile…he was afraid he'd break it if he was too rough. He would take the child to Konoha, bring it to the Hokage and she would decide what was going to happen to it.

* * *

Iruka watched desolately as the baby blew spit bubbles and weaved its arms about in his new baby crate. Iruka's books were stacked in a corner.

Shizune had dropped by not long after he came home, bringing some kind of formula, and showing him how to prepare it and feed the baby. She'd frowned at the crate but he'd glared at her, daring her to comment.

It was almost morning now and Iruka felt bone-tired. He should probably try to get some sleep. With a sigh he pushed himself up from the couch, slowly moving towards the bathroom. He would just brush his teeth and-

_What the hell? _Iruka nearly threw up as a horrid sewer-like stench filled his apartment. For a moment Iruka was tempted to just walk to his bedroom, close the door and go to sleep. But the baby started to make whiny, fussy sounds, probably a prelude to actual crying, and Iruka knew he couldn't put off dealing with this.

Breathing through his mouth he bent down and picked up the baby. At least whatever kind of toxic waste the thing had crapped out…it hadn't seeped through the blanket yet so his pillow slash baby mattress was still clean.

He brought the baby to the bathroom and stood there a little while, debating with himself about how to handle this.

Finally he put the baby down on the floor for a minute as he filled two buckets, one for the soiled blanket, and the other for the baby. Quickly he created a clone and together they held the baby as they dunked its bottom into the bucket a couple of times.

When there was more crap in the bucket than on the baby he opened his window and emptied the dirty water onto his downstairs neighbours' flowerbed. _Baby crap is probably no different than any other fertilizer. _

Iruka and his clone repeated the process until the baby was clean and then wrapped it up in a towel.

With the baby back in its –his- crate, Iruka turned his attention to the soiled blanket. It took considerably more effort to get the smell out of the blanket than it did to get it off the baby. But thankfully he could use boiling water and strong detergents on the blanket.

By the time he was finished the sun was rising and Iruka dropped down on his bed, exhausted.

Whiny little sounds emanated from the next room.

Groaning in defeat Iruka rolled off his bed and made for the living room. Almost as soon as he entered the baby stopped fussing. It was like the boy had bonded to him somehow, only crying when it was away from him. _Creepy_

The baby blinked blue-greyish eyes up at him.

"You're a freak." Iruka told it softly.

The baby made a spit bubble at him and made a spastic move with its foot, like it was kicking something.

"At least you've got the right attitude." With a sigh Iruka picked up the crate and carried it to his bedroom, putting it right next to his bed. "Now go to sleep."


	2. Chapter 2

"How about…Demonspawn?" Iruka threw a look at the crate. "No? Not your thing?" He continued to fold his socks.

A little foot was stuck straight up in the air. _Little taijutsu specialist in the making_. "What about Gai?" The foot was promptly withdrawn. "Maybe not."

With a stroke of luck, because the little thing seemed to have no hand-eye coordination at all, the baby stuck its thumb into its mouth. Did all babies have an oral fixation? Iruka snorted. "Genma then?"

He shook his head at the baby. "You don't care one way or the other, do you?" he cooed, using the tone he'd heard many an elderly lady use at newborns. "As long as I say it in a pleasant way, I can call you anything. Isn't that right little Shitfactory? Yes it is." He gently poked the baby's belly. "Yes. It. Is."

Iruka's mood had improved a lot since the previous day. Mostly because the boy had been unnaturally quiet, and let him sleep halfway through the day before starting to fuss again.

A feeding, a puke-ruined shirt and a cleaning later the baby was once again happily…babying away at the world.

After Iruka was done folding his laundry, he poured himself a nice big cup of sake and turned on the television. Then he lifted the boy awkwardly out of his crate and held him in his arms. Kids needed touch, and he figured babies were no different. Hopefully the rash wasn't something contagious.

The baby blinked up at him curiously and waved one of his hands around, apparently trying to reach Iruka's cup.

"You want some?" He held the cup just out of the little hands reach. "No way, kiddo, not until you're at least nine."

Iruka lazily zapped through channels for a while, occasionally jiggling the boy, which seemed to amuse the kid if he judged the sounds right.

Nothing on the television held his attention for long so finally he just turned it off and looked down. "I'm gonna have to go and buy you diapers you know. Can't keep using your blanket. That means we're going to have to go out."

The boy blinked up at him seriously.

"You think you're ready for that?" Iruka asked. "We're going to get a lot of questions, you know. People are going to want to know where you came from. And you can't tell them. We're going to have to say that I knocked up a civilian." He looked at the boy and sighed. "They're going to question my standards."

_Spitbubble_.

"No need to spit at me. Blame your mother." Iruka knocked back his leftover sake, got out his secret cash stash, wrapped the boy in an extra blanket and set out to face the overly curious masses of Konoha.

* * *

"Oh my, Iruka-sensei, who is this? Are you baby sitting? What a…what a sweet baby!"

Iruka nodded pleasantly at the mother of one of his students. He'd taken exactly 23 steps outside of his building. "He's mine actually. The mother can't take care of him right now, so he will be staying with me from now on."

"Oh you poor thing," the mother cooed.

Iruka wasn't sure if she meant him or the baby. Probably the baby.

"Please let me know if you need anything, Iruka-sensei, you have done so much for my little Hamura-chan. I would love the help you in return if I could."

"Thank you," Iruka said. "I appreciate it."

"Well, I'll see you around Iruka-sensei."

* * *

Eight steps later another mother approached him.

"Hello Iruka-sensei! Who is this?"

"This is my boy. His mother can't take care of him, so he will be staying with me for the time being."

"Oh, Iruka-sensei, that's so typically you," she gushed, "you're so responsible. You'll make a fantastic father!"

"Umm, thank you?"

"If you need any help, please let me know."

* * *

"Iruka-sensei! How are you? And who is this little…baby?"

* * *

"Sensei!"

* * *

"Good afternoon, Iruka sensei! Who is this?"

* * *

Iruka groaned. Did the entire population of Konoha know who he was? He wasn't even halfway to the market and already seven people, well seven _women_, had approached him to ask about _'his'_ baby.

He was sure that in about half a day the whole of Konoha would know that Iruka had a kid and that the mother couldn't take care of it. He hadn't given any more details then that, but he was fairly sure they would embellish the story on their own and he'd be hearing whispers behind his back for at least a week.

"This is all you fault you know," he said, looking down at the bundle in his arms.

The boy blinked and Iruka frowned. "Yes, you're right. It's not your fault. This is all Tsunade's doing. Let's pay her a visit after your next feeding. You can have a go at her."

"Iruka."

Iruka looked up. "Hey Kotetsu."

"What's that?"

"It's a baby."

"Why are you carrying a baby around?"

"It's mine."

"Yeah, and I'm shagging Genma."

"No really. It's mine."

"Come off it."

"I had a one night stand with a civilian and she can't look after it so she dropped it at my doorstep."

Kotetsu gave him a look that told him he didn't believe a word Iruka said, but he still bent over and pulled the blanket aside a little ways. His eyebrows rose up and the corner of his mouth twitched. "She drug you or something?"

"Ha ha."

"Bashed you over the head and dragged you to her lair?"

"He's just a little unhealthy right now." Iruka said, feeling strangely irritated. "It'll get better once the rash is gone and he's gained a little weight…and his hair starts growing…and…Oh shut up, he just needs to grow into his body."

Kotetsu smirked. "Well, well...maybe he is yours after all…"

Iruka looked at his friend suspiciously, unsure if he was being insulted. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing."

Kotetsu's face turned serious. "You need any help? I can take your mission desk shift sometimes if you need it."

"I'm off mission desk duty."

"You are?"

"Yeah. Tsunade-" damn, he couldn't tell Kotetsu about that. "Tsunade said the kid needs a lot of care in the beginning. So I requested time off."

"Nice of her to take a personal interest in your _son_." Kotetsu's voice virtually dripped with sarcasm.

Iruka gave a noncommittal grunt. He knew Kotetsu didn't believe a word of what he'd said. "I have to go. Go and buy diapers."

"Right. Raidou and I will come by sometime soon." Kotetsu turned to go but turned back at the last moment to look at the baby again. "See you soon, little bugger," he said. Then he looked up again. " Hey, what's his name?"

"Minato" Iruka blurted out. He wanted to take it back as soon as he'd said it, but it was the first thing that popped into his mind, and he couldn't take it back now.

Kotetsu looked at him for a second and then laughed out loud. He shook his head and slapped Iruka on the back. "The kid could have a worse name."

Iruka supposed he could. He hoisted the kid a little higher in his arms. "Come on kiddo, let's buy stuff."

They started out towards the market again at a determined pace.

"Hey there, Iruka-sensei! Who's that you're carrying around?"

"Evil scientists tried to clone me, but it went horribly wrong." Iruka said blithely, and kept on walking.

* * *

Hours later Iruka kicked his door closed and dropped four heavy bags onto the floor. Minato was sleeping in a handy sling on his back. Thank the gods for baby stores and helpful mothers. He now had more baby stuff than he could shake a stick at. And most of it had been free too.

It had taken him a little while, but finally he'd figured out that all those curious, pushy people offering their help…they actually meant what they were saying. Once he'd mumbled something about needing clothes all those friendly mothers wanted to donate the baby clothes that their little darlings (now attending the academy) didn't fit anymore.

Tonight a few kunoichi were even coming over to drop off some second hand furniture. All he'd needed to buy himself was diapers and more formula.

His secret cash stash was safe. For now. He could use it to buy booze.


	3. Chapter 3

The kunoichi finished his bottle of sake. And then another one. But that was okay. Because thanks to them Iruka was now the proud owner of a proper crib, a high chair, which he was told he couldn't use right now, but would come in handy very soon, and a _thing to change the diaper on_.

The floor worked just as well for changing the diaper, he thought, but he had to admit it was nice not to have to bend down. He would just have to pay more attention and not forget Minato was on there, because that was quite a drop for a baby.

The sake loosened the tongues, and Iruka was amused at the stories he heard. Not all the moms thought their baby was perfect when they first saw it. One of the mothers of his students had needed a little help during delivery and when she'd seen the deformed head of her baby she'd had to bite her tongue not to tell de medic-nin to put it out of its misery. "I thought something was seriously wrong with it. I mean, how could something that deformed ever be healthy? The medic told me it would all be okay, but I just couldn't believe it at the time", she'd said. "Of course the medic was right and he turned into a perfect little boy within a few weeks and I love him to pieces, but I'll never forget how he looked that first time."

Then there were the moms that did think their babies were perfect when they were born, but they soon discovered that even perfect babies had their imperfections. When one of them admitted that there'd been times she'd wanted to drop her beautiful baby girl out the window because she just couldn't stand the constant crying anymore, the rest all jumped in with their own stories of despair.

Iruka threw a look at Minato, who seemed absolutely fascinated with his own left foot, and decided that if he was going to be stuck with a baby, he'd rather have an ugly one than a crier.

* * *

"Yeah" Iruka groaned and rubbed against the warm, hard body that was covering him.

"I can't do this."

It took Iruka a few moments to wrap his head around the fact that Genma was pulling away. "What?"

"I can't do this. Not with him in the room."

_No no no no no no _"Genma, come on! He's a baby. He doesn't have a clue what's going on. You know he starts fussing if I put him in the other room."

"Yeah. I know," Genma said, rolling off Iruka and onto his back. "That's not normal, Iruka. There's something strange about that kid. I just- I can't do it when he's in the room."

Iruka pushed himself up and looked down at his friend's frowning face. "Oh for fuck sake… Genma please…I haven't gotten laid in ages."

"So, I'm not the only one who's creeped out by having a kid in the room?"

"Damnit Genma, I haven't tried with anyone else, alright."

Iruka flopped onto his back, his dick slowly deflating. "You think I don't think it's strange that he only ever cries when I'm not near him?"

"Really? He _never_ cries when he's with you?"

Iruka shook his head. "All he does when he's hungry or dirty is fussing. He starts making noises like he's about to start crying…but he never does. A couple of weeks ago I let him sit in a stinky diaper for a couple hours just to see what would happen."

"Hmm," Genma turned his head to look at him. "Maybe you shouldn't piss him off."

Iruka groaned and smacked Genma with the pillow. "Don't make it worse, you bastard. I'm worried enough as it is. Don't go planting strange ideas in my mind. He's just a baby, and so far he hasn't done a single thing to suggest he's evil in some way."

"Except for killing erections."

"Well, yeah. Except for that. But he didn't kill mine. You did that all on your own."

"Sorry."

Genma seemed to hesitate a little, but then he hopped of the bed. Iruka sighed in defeat until he felt the sheet being pulled off the bed.

Genma walked up to the crib and looked down at the little boy lying in it. "I'm sorry kiddo, we just want a little privacy okay? He isn't going anywhere, I just don't want you taking a peek." With that he carefully draped the sheet over the crib.

Iruka raised his eyebrow at Genma when he turned back to the bed. "He couldn't see us to begin with, there are curtains on the crib."

Genma shrugged and crawled on top of him again. "Shut up."

Iruka decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth.

* * *

Iruka rocked the crib with his foot while he and Raidou watched a movie on tv.

Babyish giggles came form the crib and Iruka grinned at the sound, but then a familiar smell reached him. "Hey," he said, poking Raidou in the side. " You feel like training your olfactory resistance?"

Raidou kept his eyes on the screen. "Sure," he said. Then his mind caught up to his mouth. "Train my what?"

"Olfactory resistance."

"Huh?"

Iruka snorted. "I smell crap. Minato's at it again."

Raidou grinned. "Bombs away!"

"If only. If the stuff resembled bombs in any way he would be a lot easier to clean. This crap just leaks everywhere."

"Thanks for the image."

"Want to do the honors?"

"No way in hell. Your baby, your suffering."

"I'll remember that once you've got kids."

"I plan on having a wife to take care of the hard parts. I'll be the one who gets to teach mini-me to throw kunai. You know, the fun stuff."

"Well, at least we know he won't make it past chuunin either if he inherits your aim."

"Hey!"

* * *

Two months passed and Iruka was slowly getting used to being a dad.

The kid came to school with him, and, after he'd harassed Tsunade into agreeing with him, even to the mission desk.

Slowly, _very slowly_, the boy was getting less ugly. With regular feedings Minato was starting to fill out. His ribs weren't visible anymore, and the arms and legs no longer looked too long for his body. He now looked like a baby was supposed to look. Fat and round.

The rash was gone too, which helped a lot, and his hair was finally growing. It was still patchy but no where near as bad as two months ago. It looked like eventually the kid would have a full head of hair.

Maybe he would never be a really pretty baby, Iruka thought, but he was glad to settle for something approaching normal.

* * *

Iruka was trying to feed Minato and stamp a mission report at the same time when the summons came.

"Iruka-sensei, Tsunade-sama would like to talk to you."

He looked at Shizune in surprise for a moment before nodding. "Of course Shizune-san, when-"

"She would like to see you right now, Iruka-sensei. You may take Minato with you."

"Alright," he muttered, a bit bewildered at the sudden summon.

When he arrived at Tsunade's office, he saw she was not alone. Kakashi stood in the corner of the room, looking as bored as ever.

Iruka nodded at them both. "Tsunade-sama, Hatake-san."

"Hello, Iruka-sensei," Tsunade said. "Minato is looking well."

Iruka nodded but didn't comment. He wasn't here for small talk. She wouldn't have pulled him out of his shift without a serious reason.

Tsunade drummed her fingers on the table and sighed. "Well, let's get right to the point shall we?"

Neither Iruka nor Kakashi answered, so she continued on. "Kakashi-san has discovered that you, and, as we suspect, Minato, are being watched."

Iruka frowned, shocked at this news. If he was being watched he should have known about it.

"By who?" he demanded.

"By one of our own chuunin."

One of their own was following him? "Who?" Iruka asked again.

"Sato"

Iruka frowned. He didn't know much about the guy. He knew he was a chuunin and a couple of years younger than Iruka, but other than that...

"It is important that your behaviour does not change, now that you know this. You need to keep acting exactly as you have been the last couple of months. We need to know why you two are being watched and to who Sato is reporting. Kakashi-san will attempt to gather as much information as possible without alerting Sato-san."

"And what am I going to do?" Iruka asked.

"For the time being…nothing. Kakashi-san will brief you on his findings, you just need to keep your routine as it is right now, but always be prepared for an attack or an attempt to kidnap Minato."

Iruka nodded, reflexively tightening his hold on the kid.

"You can go back to work now, Iruka-sensei."

Iruka bowed and turned to go, and unpleasant feeling churning in his gut.

"Iruka."

He turned back.

She nodded at Minato. "Keep him close to you."

Iruka hoisted the boy a little higher in his arms. "I always do."


	4. Chapter 4

A week passed, and nothing out of the ordinary happened. Iruka was much more alert than he had been, but still he only spotted Sato once. The other chuunin had to be pretty damn skilled or else the shadowing had stopped. He hoped it was the latter. It was a much more reassuring thought than the first option. He didn't see Kakashi either, even though he knew the other man had to be around.

On a friday night, nearly two weeks after his disturbing meeting with Tsunade, Kotetsu and Raidou were coming over. Minato had pretty much put a stop to Iruka's nights out. But nothing was stopping them from having a 'night in'. A little booze, a few snacks, good company...like going to a bar, only cheaper, and with a baby on your lap.

Iruka's bell rung when he was in the middle of changing Minato. He grinned. _Nothing says 'welcome' like the smell of a sewage pit on a hot day._ "It's open!" He yelled in the direction of the door. They'd been here often enough to evade or dismantle his traps.

He heard his door and the tell-tale sound of a couple of kunai flying though the air and landing safely in his wall. "You guys are going to reset that one before you leave."

"Yeah yeah," Raidou's voice sounded from the hallway.

Iruka heard the shuffling sounds of people taking off shoes and hanging up jackets. He waited a few more seconds and then...

"Ahh damnit Iruka! Warn a guy would you?" "What the hell are you feeding him?"

Iruka grinned and looked down at Minato. "Hear that? Your shit is a lethal weapon. You're going to be the best shinobi ever."

Minato gurgled and kicked his little legs energetically.

Trusting Raidou and Kotetsu to make themselves comfortable, he continued wiping away the last traces of crap. " There, clean again. You want powder?"

Minato waved his arms.

"Yeah, you do, don't you? You always want powder. You're a powder monster. When you're grown up you're going to invent a powder jutsu that will choke your enemies to death and keep your butt silky smooth."

Iruka kept up his mindless babbling while he powdered Minato and then put a clean diaper on him. He blew a raspberry on Minato's belly that left the baby in a fit of giggles and then picked him up.

Iruka turned to finally greet his friends, and nearly dropped Minato.

Raidou and Kotetsu were looking at him with big grins. Behind them stood Kakashi, looking entirely unimpressed.

Iruka felt the blood flowing to his face, resulting in an unavoidable blush. It was one thing for his closest friends to see him acting like a nutcase with Minato, but it was something else entirely to have the famous copy-ninja see it. The copy-ninja who already thought he was overly emotional when it came to kids...

"Ah, Kakashi-san, wh- welcome." At the last possible moment Iruka decided that saying 'what are you doing here' was perhaps not the politest thing to do. He had the sneaking suspicion that Kakashi had noticed his slip-up though.

"Please take a seat, everybody. I'll...uh...I'll open some windows." Glad for the chance to turn his burning face away from his amused audience, he quickly opened two windows and took a deep breath of cool evening air, willing the blush to go down.

When he turned back both Raidou and Kotetsu had taken a seat on the couch, but Kakashi remained standing. Raidou and Kotetsu were looking at him and the copy-nin, eyes going back and forth between them, like they were watching a particularly interesting show. He threw them a withering glare and sighed when their grins only became broader.

He needed a drink... "Who wants a drink?"

Raidou and Kotetsu took it as the rhetoric question it was, and didn't answer. Kakashi shook his head with a polite "No, thank you."

Iruka handed Minato to Kotetsu and he was grateful when his friend immediately started babbling nonsense at the baby. 'See?' He wanted to say to Kakashi, it's not just me. Every chuunin does it.

In the kitchen Iruka grabbed four glasses, in case Kakashi changed his mind later, a bottle of sake, and a bowl of arare to snack on.

Minato was quietly trying to eat Kotetsu's vest when Iruka walked back into the room, but from his friends weird looks he guessed that the boy had been fussy when Iruka was out of the room.

He shrugged helplessly. Yes, it was strange that Minato had bonded to him so strongly. Yes, it was creepy that he only ever cried when Iruka was not around and that he stopped immediately when he sensed Iruka nearby. But what was he gonna do about it? He'd decided to just accept Minato's quirks. The kid had gotten a rotten start in life and no one could blame him for being a little...odd. There was nothing more sinister to it. Just a an abused kid with some relatively harmless personality disorders.

Iruka put the stuff he was carrying down at the table and started to pour the drinks. Kakashi meanwhile had taken a seat on the other side of Kotetsu.

It was only when Iruka turned around to give Kotetsu his drink that he noticed what was going on. Kakashi was studying Minato intently, sharingan exposed, while Kotetsu was holding the baby up for inspection. Minato seemed fascinated with the red eye and was staring back without blinking, little hands reaching out to Kakashi.

Iruka's gut reaction was to pull Minato away and demand to know what the hell they were doing. But he took a deep breath and reigned his protective instincts in. They weren't doing anything to hurt Minato. The boy didn't even seem displeased.

After a few long moments Kakashi pulled his hitai-ate down again to cover his eye.

Iruka lifted Minato out of Kotetsu's arms and cuddled him close for a moment, both of them comforted by the physical contact. Kakashi was slouched back on the couch and his eye was half lidded, but despite his seemingly relaxed pose he followed Iruka's, or rather Minato's, every move. It made Iruka inexplicably nervous.

There was an uncomfortable silence.

Iruka swallowed and broke the silence to ask the question he wasn't sure he wanted the answer to. "Is he- Did you see anything...abnormal?"

Kakashi shook his head. "Nothing out of the ordinary, Iruka-sensei."

Iruka felt relief, and then wanted to kick himself for it. Tsunade had looked Minato over extensively. She'd even had a Hyuga look at the boy. They hadn't seen anything weird about him, so why should Kakashi?

There was always this niggling doubt in the back of his mind though. Why would anyone 'sacrifice' a baby like they had with Minato if nothing was wrong with it? And why-

"Maa...Iruka-sensei, do you mind if I close the windows? It's getting a little chilly."

"Ah, I'm sorry, Kakashi-san, of course. I'll just-"

The jounin was up and closing the windows before Iruka even had the chance to put Minato down. Damn it, now Kakashi thought he was a bad host too. He felt entirely out of his element with the jounin here.

"Iruka-sensei?"

"Yes, Kakashi-san?"

"Sit."

Iruka dropped down on his comfortable chair, Minato squealing excitedly at the sudden move.

"Just relax Iruka," Raidou said, "I know it's a bit of a strange situation with that guy following you and the kid, but it's all under control. You just need to act like you always do."

Iruka stared at his friends. "How-"

"They've been informed." Kakashi answered for them. "They're now part of your protection detail."

"Ah...okay?" Protection detail? There was now a team assigned to keeping him and Minato safe? He hadn't really realized the situation was that serious. "And you?"

"It seemed logical to create a legitimate reason for me to spend a lot of time around you," Kakashi said with a perfectly innocent smile. "We're going to become _friends_ Iruka-sensei."

Iruka wondered at the way Kakashi said the word 'friends', but Kotetsu asked him about changing diapers in a classroom filled with kids and Iruka forgot to worry about it.

As the evening progressed Iruka's nervousness disappeared. Kakashi acted as if he really was a friend of Raidou and Kotetsu, like he'd simply come along just to have a pleasant evening. He joined in as they chatted. Even shared some funny stories about team seven.

When the three of them finally left at one o'clock in the night, Iruka was sad to see them go. All three of them.

He didn't see them again that weekend and on monday his normal routine continued. Teach his class. Home. Eat. Mission desk. Home. Sleep. Repeat. And of course bringing Minato with him wherever he went.

He still kept an eye out for Sato, but he didn't spot him. Not once.

The next friday brought another visit from Kotetsu, Raidou and Kakashi. There was no awkwardness this time and Iruka was surprised at how easy it was to pretend to be friends with the famous copy-nin. He found his eyes drifting to Kakashi just a little bit too often. More often than not, Kakashi caught him looking and even though the jounin's expression never changed at those times, Iruka still had the feeling the other man was...amused. Iruka had to force himself to focus more on his real friends. It was only natural though, he figured. Of course he was curious about Kakashi. The man was a legend, and a complete mystery, anyone would want to look at him...right?

* * *

AN: Hi guys, I'd like to thank everyone who has reviewed so far. I really appreciate you guys taking the time to do that. Thanks :)


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